Sometimes I feel like I might finally be content with the way I look, and then I look in the mirror and it’s like
adults: “what are your plans for the summer?” “what are you planning on studying in college?” “what do you want to do in the future?”
DATING TIP: Hold the door for your date. Rip the door off its hinges. Use the door as a weapon to fight off other men. Establish dominance.
police officer: you’re under arrest.
me: im rubber, you’re glue. what bounces off of me sticks to you(:
police officer: fuck
if you try to tell me cold doesnt have a smell you’re wrong
when its really cold you can literally smell how cold it is